I’ve only typed out the title of this post and I’m already on the verge of tears. Ya know a pastor once said
“Everything you go through is for someone else. That’s why when you see someone going through what you once did, you feel for them so hard. You even end up fighting for them to.”
This is true.
I was in an abusive relationship and the moment I sense another girl is in one, I pray hard. I think about them constantly and fight their fight with them. Everything that once happened to me in that unhealthy relationship comes rushing to my mind and my worry kicks in again.
I’m pleading with you to stop being quiet. Stop ignoring the little things that seem like no big deal. Find someone to talk to and start loving yourself. Believe me when I say I know it’s easier said then done. Girl, I was in your shoes. I literally shut out all my family. Everything that was unhealthy, but he made me think was small I shoved away as “no.big.deal.” The night he pulled a knife out on me could have been the night he ended my life. The night I made him angry in the car and he started driving reckless is the night he could have ended my life.
But Thank God I’m still here
and I want you to be too. I want you to live a long life… a happy one.
I need each of you to fully understand that my inbox is always open. I’m here to pray with and for you.
And for my ladies who are now out of that bad relationship…
Stay aware. Become self-aware in your thoughts and actions because you may even become the abuser in your next relationship. Again, I’m speaking from existence. I know what’s like bringing in old habits. The screaming, name calling, and so on. Be knowledgable in what is unhealthy and stay alert of behaviors.
This is just a quick Public Service Announcement for the girl who is currently going through it and the girl who has gone through it.
- Stop settling
- Don’t wait for him to “change”
- Protect yourself
- Know your worth
- Be self-aware
- Know what is unhealthy
- Stay alert
- Talk about it
And to the friends of the girl in the unhealthy relationship, don’t you dare judge her. Don’t tell her she’s stupid for going back. Comfort her and pray with her. Find resources for her. Be her friend.
I love you all from the bottom of my heart. I’m fighting your fight with you. Here’s to loving ourselves.